Castle Cakes and Saintly Names ~ Celebrating the Saints With Your Children

I wish I could remember the person who shared with me the idea of celebrating our children's names, (because I'm sure that I didn't come up with it on my own). I'd really like to thank her for being the one responsible for the reason why I get to eat cake 6 times more per year than the average parent. You should join me, really you should!

So, what was this great idea? It's the celebration of your child's name, through the remembrance of the saint that they share a name with.

Now, if you went through a special phase where, for reasons that you can't remember, naming your child Floyd or Optimus or Tonto sounded like a great idea, don't worry, you can still jump in on this party (who knows, they may become the first saint of their name)!

Over the years, when I've shared this fun way of incorporating the lives of the saints into real family life, some of my friends have asked how to do it if their children aren't named after saints. Simple! Have your child choose a saint that he/she admires.  They can "adopt" that saint, if you will, asking him/her to pray for them.  Then, when their special saint's feast day comes up on the calendar, it's time to celebrate! (Online resources for feast days and saint bios here and here.)

There are several truly wonderful books written on the lives of the saints for your kids to enjoy, and also a lot of poorly written and illustrated ones too, so be choosy! One of our favorites is Saints: Lives and Illuminations by Ruth Sanderson. She wrote a second volume as well, which is equally inspiring.

Our family's tradition is to bake a cake in the shape of a castle.  Then, we read about our child's saint, and talk about what it means to live a life of saintly virtue.  When our oldest was about four years old, he became fascinated with knights and kings. It seemed natural for us, then, to make a connection between saintly virtue and knighthood.

We found these three books to be a great way to encourage our boys toward chivalry, courage, generosity, sacrifice, service and perseverance - strong, admirable and virtuous behaviors of the saints!

Brave Young Knight

The Squire and the Scroll

I'd Be Your Hero

As the older boys have outgrown these books, they have found a great selection of literary joys that inspire them to follow the path of virtue, including Sir Wyvern Pugilist's Dragon Slayers. 

They also truly love taking on the teacher role, being the ones who read to the younger boys, passing on what they have learned about striving toward a life of virtue.

Our boys really look forward to the remembrance of their special saint.  This is one tradition that I believe will have valuable, and lasting implications for our sons.  They even talking about passing the tradition on to their own kids!

Although I tailor everything we do around here to boys, since we haven't any girls (yet!), I think that this could easily be modified for girls, using the same castle mold and presenting the idea of what it means to be God's princess, discussing the virtues that the female saints heroically lived during their lifetime.

{Castle Cake Mold from Nordic Ware}

One thing I love about using the cake mold, is that I rarely ever do any decorating, and I always use a boxed cake mix, letting each child choose their favorite flavor.  Sometimes I dust on a little powdered sugar or drizzle on a simple glaze (it looks like icicles when it dries!).  It really is great enjoyed plain or served up with a scoop of your favorite ice cream.

I love this decorating idea for saints whose feast days fall during Christmas! 

{Photo Credit}

A really simple and sweet way to decorate the castle for girls.

 {Photo Credit}

Good old powdered sugar never disappoints!

{Photo Credit}

Do you have any celebratory traditions that you 

enjoy in honor of the saints?

Please share them with us!

Can You Spare a Square?? Revelations That Result When the Toilet Paper Runs Out

Last weekend during Andrew's wrestling tournament, while making my hundredth trip to the restroom, I mindlessly wandered into a stall with no toilet paper.  I was probably daydreaming about the German Fest that would take place at our parish the next day - the sauerkraut, the bierocks, the pie - and all the food fascination/distraction left me hanging out in the wrong stall.

No biggie, I thought.  There's a million other moms here, so surely someone will pass me some paper.

Casually I called out for assistance, waiting for a roll to come flying overhead, a stack to be passed underneath, a square to be spared by the neighbor next door. Within seconds, someone was kind enough to share.

My little paperless incident reminded me of the Seinfeld episode where Elaine is stuck in a stall with an empty roll, so she sweetly asks the woman next door if she can "spare a square," but her request is only met with rude rejection. That night after asking Steve if he remembered that episode (Seinfeld reruns and spaghetti were a ritual for us back in the college days), we both started to laugh out loud, knowing instantly that we just had to You Tube it.

Sure enough!:

What a scream! It's the one-ply, two-ply banter that gets me every time!

That night, for whatever reason, the idea that our children must feel a lot like Elaine popped into my mind.  They need us every day, in all kinds of situations, and they need us a lot.  And, sometimes, as the hours of the day wind down, along with our nerves, answering their every need and want can become so very difficult, because we feel like we don't have a square to spare, we just can't spare one. more. moment. for someone else.

I've noticed, however, that for me, personally, since I have made the decision to unplug a little this Lent from Facebook, e-mail and even blogging, that I feel much less irritated by being the one who is always on call to answer the kiddo's constant questions, requests and interruptions. 

If I'm really going to be honest with myself, the truth behind the ease in irritation is that my attention isn't being drawn away throughout the day by people and situations, outside of my family, whom I think need me, or expect me to be there for them as well. 

Attention divided.  Time divided.  Heart Divided.
Mind exhausted.  Emotions unraveled.

My phone just beeped....another text, another e-mail, I'd better get that, it might be urgent.
9 times out of 10 it's not.
But 9 times out of 10, in the checking to see who or what is calling, I'm drawn away from the moment, from the task at hand, from the living of the present life, from the noticing....

The noticing of feet swinging freely at the kitchen table as the toddler noshes happily on waffles that run with butter and syrup, swirls of it dripping off his chin, morning sunlight from finger-printed windows streams through blonde locks, cheeks still rosy from being pressed against a warm pillow.  

He's beautiful. Just like this. Just right here.

How many times have I missed this?

I begin to count up all of the times in my mind when my children have come to me with a question or a story while I'm "busy" checking a message, responding to a text, letting a Facebook friend - whom I wouldn't want to think that I don't care - know that I adored their family photo, or am happy for their success or sorry for their struggle, and as I type my children talk to someone who can hear them, but who isn't really listening.

The expectation Steve and I have that our children look at us, really look us in the eye, when we talk to them about all of the important things, has become nothing but hypocrisy, as time after time, I have not been willing to show them why eye contact matters, why attentiveness matters, why acknowledging the other matters.

I start to wonder what if...

What if one of them, or all of them, have had a story to tell, a dream to share, a picture to present, an idea to unravel, a question to be answered, but decided to hold on to it, to tuck it away, to think less of any of it because there wasn't anyone there who was really ready to receive it, to savor it, to ponder it, to share the value of it and to unravel it with them??

I once heard Dr. Dobson say that if you ever visit an orphanage and the children are crying, that it's a good sign, because the little ones know that they will be heard, that their needs will be met and that they still believe someone is coming to reach out for them, to love them.  Silence speaks of the abandonment of trust, of confidence of hope in others to help, to recognize and acknowledge a need.

I don't want that kind of silence in this house.  I want to hear my children, all of them, each and every time - even though I know, without a doubt, that there will be moments when I will feel pressed to the point of crazy. 

I found this little clip on Anne Voskamp's weekend summary of inspirations for her readers to enjoy, and after watching it several times, smiling, smiling so big, I knew I had to share it with you:

Our children are watching us, aren't they?

All of the time.

They notice our actions, our expressions, or eagerness to press on toward good, to make an inconvenient sacrifice. At the same time, they see our preoccupations with less important matters, choosing lesser goods hoping that they'll fulfill greater needs.  They observe with disappointment, but gradual acceptance our hesitations to help those closest to us, to give ourselves to the priorities that matter most.  

We tell our children, every day, loud and clear, what is important in life through our actions.

A big cup of coffee.

An early morning work-out.

Folding the laundry, paying the bills, kissing our husbands good-bye every time they leave for work.

All of that, yes.
Then, we plug in.

Picking up that phone again, and again and again.  A few minutes at the computer here and there, times when we assure ourselves it's okay to check a status, because for the moment the kids are actually sharing and enjoying their toys. When that time runs out we send them outside to soak up some sun, to drink in a little fresh air. Next is giving our consent to snacking or cartooning or suggest that they sit beside a mountainous stack of carefully chosen books and hope that they will read them, one-by-one, until the picture windows of their precious minds are full.

It's okay, then, because they're content, occupied, not needing us, right? Or missing us...
Maybe.
But, what if in 10 or 20 years we wake up and realize that we've missed them?

We were supposed to watch them enjoy the fresh air, cuddle over cartoons, read to them or with them or at least savor the endearing sight of pudgy fingers pointing to page after page of pictures that captivate their attention.

Time flies by, and soon they become the ones sitting across from friends at a restaurant checking their messages instead of engaging, hearing their professors, but not really listening, feeling a false "need" on the other end, a need that presses them in an unnecessary way toward the harsh reality that no matter how many Facebook posts and e-mails they respond to they'll never really know anyone, unless they give to those who are present with them.

All because this - this being plugged in, yet checked out, is what we've shown them to be important.

Our time will come, too, when we will have a story to tell our kids, a dream to share, a picture to present, an idea to unravel, a question to be answered, and wonder if any of it really matters at all, because our kids, now grown, have shown us that there are more important things to do.

I admit that technology will always be a part of our day-to-day life, but less than a week deep into Lent, I've learned that, for me, as much as I think I monitor my attentiveness toward the mighty i-phone, or computer (a moment here, a moment there, after bed-time only....) perhaps my perception of that time has been off. Way off.

And, not only do I want to change that, I need to change that.

So, if I'm not there to "like" your status, or praise your pictures on Facebook, if I'm late returning an e-mail, or delayed in responding to a text, please know that you're important to me, that there's no ill-intent in my inattentiveness.  It's just that I'm being asked, by my precious ones, right here, right now, to "spare a square," and I really don't want to miss a moment of it.

Skippin' Class to Check Out the Glass - Our Homeschool Field Trip to Karg Art Glass

The stereotyping of homeschoolers as being either unsocialized, improperly educated introverts or academically superior and two-grades-ahead-of-the-rest intellects are both overstated misconceptions that most of us spend our careers trying to refute with reasonable explanations and personal examples (although being accused of academic excellence isn't really that painful or offensive).

One thing we're never accused of, however, is being professional or, at least, very serious field trippers, and really, that's a shame.

When the memorization of Latin phrases, mountain heights, and 17 stanza poems leaves my sons hanging their heads out the window for a breath of fresh air, I know it's time to dream up another field trip.  Hey, no arguments from the professor, especially during the winter months where the house begins to feel more like a cage keeping in a class of stir-crazy critters from the cold than an ark of unlimited learning.

If our homeschool group doesn't have any major explorations planned, sometimes I have to improvise:

Hey boys, who wants to go to Dicks Sporting Goods and calculate discounts on running attire for mom for a prize? Most accurate answers wins a new jump rope! (Our Henry could literally write a book called "101 Non-Jumping Uses for a Jump Rope.....so don't go knockin' the jump rope.) 

- OR -

Who wants to go to J.Raes bakery, interview the owner, and discuss her dreams and business plan for the future of the bakery business? Then we could snarf down some sweets, and run home to concoct our own master cupcake recipe?  Or, nap, we could nap off the sugar crash.

{I would love to have a piece like this in the massive flower garden I dream of planting some day!}

Last week was one such week where we were in serious - desperate - need of a jailbreak. Baby had officially taken over my brain and my body.  Children no learn from me.  Brain no workie, belly too biggie.  

Thankfully, a saint in our homeschool group had organized a tour of a local artisan glass shop called Karg Art Glass.  Adding happy to my heart was the fact that our oldest son, Benedict, had the day off from school, so he was able to come with us. His presence on the trip made it feel like the good ol' days again!  

Here's a little fuzzy i-phone photo collage of our trip.  You're going to be wowed, I know. Charlie refused to be held by anyone but me, which made juggling the phone a little tricky.  Plus, we were on the wrong side of the light source, so use your imagination on the dark images (which is like every single one).

When we first arrived, our group was led to through the grand gift shop to the studio on the backside of the shop where the apprentices and artisans create their masterpieces.

We stood together for quite a while admiring the work of two of the artisans as they crafted what we thought was going to be a vase or a vessel of some sort.

But, when one of them swiftly tapped the very end of the glass shape with a special tool, causing the glass to fan out, we realized he was making a plate shaped piece of art (later he told us it was a custom order), one similar to the brightly colored pieces that they had hanging outside:

Among the many facts that the kids learned about the glass craft is that all glass is made of sand.  The artisans at Karg make their own glass, adding small quantities of lime, silt and ash to the mixture.  The glass is kept ready for use in a 2000 degree furnace.

A kiln (one that may be used to bake ceramics), which can be controlled at lower temperatures, is used to soften colored glass rods that are rolled on to the forming pieces to create swirls of color in the glass. The hue and intensity of the colors emerges from the various oxides that are added to the glass.

The continual heating, shaping and re-heating of the glass keeps it malleable, allowing the artisans to shape the beautiful creation they have imagined into a reality. An average plate requires about 45 minutes of uninterrupted work time. 

The gallery of artistic pieces is truly stunning.  Displayed for everyone to see are smaller, more affordable pieces and toys, such as marbles and kaleidoscopes to more massive pieces that require an appreciating eye and a hefty pocketbook to take home.

This depiction of the solar system was the one piece that all of the homeschoolers seemed to gravitate to. Pictures do not do it justice! If you can't read the price tag, that's a 10 with 3 zeros! This one belongs in a museum - it's truly amazing!

My heart really longs to be able to support local artisans in their craft, whatever it may be.  Of course, it's more expensive, but only because our eyes have become accustomed to chain-store price tags. While keeping the fridge stocked and car running top out our financial priorities right now, I do hope to come back one day, and buy a lovely piece of glass art for our home.

For now, we'll enjoy the colorful marbles that the boys delighted in picking out from the gallery's stock of more affordable treasures.  The marbles and our memories - another one down in the homeschool book of field-trips.

Mamas Movin' With Mary - Let's Get Together!!

If you read Monday's post on considering exercise as a sacrificial offering this Lent, it may have left you longing for a more meaningful....or at least social way to go about it.  Well, get your walking or running buddies together, because there's an incredible movement out there that's bound to take off among women across the nation called Mamas Movin' With Mary, and they would love for you to be a part of it!

Starting a chapter in your parish or your community is simple.  There's no formal meetings, or super-detailed agenda -  just bring your running shoes, your rosary, a little determination and you're good to go!  You can read more about MMM and their mission on their website: 

mamasmovinwithmary.com

Planning for Lent: How Sacrificing Time for Exercise Can Become A Lifelong Offering of Love {MMM Vol.5}

Fourteen years ago I was joyously living life as a newlywed, and two weeks after reciting vows I discovered that I was also newly pregnant! During my expectant months, I must have had at least a hundred conversations with other women about pregnancy, labor, delivery, nursing, how to soothe a fussy baby, etc., etc. But, not one of those conversations ever included anything about the post-pregnancy portrait: Oh, the sagging, the scarring and the stretching! Looking in the mirror and seeing a battle weary body, the evidence of the sacrificial offering of bringing a beautiful baby into the world could not be hidden!

The shape of things after giving birth really is a minor detail, I suppose, in light of the many more important maternal gifts and graces, namely the precious soul wrapped sweetly in the comfort of your arms.  Still, I would have appreciated a little bit of warning. Nothing overly dramatic, a simple "get ready, it isn't gonna be pretty" would have been fine.  Couldn't we all at least get a consolation glass of wine or a box of chocolates with our sagging and stretch marks?

Embracing your changing shape for 9 months, to say yes to the curves for the sake of the joy of carrying life within is a relatively easy level of acceptance, it's an entirely new level of acceptance, however, to see yourself post-partum 1, 2 or even 10 times without feeling just a little bit undone.

Getting back into a regular exercise routine (thank goodness for strollers!) and eating well was the slow, but steady pathway back to a similar version of my old self.  But, it wasn't until our third child was born that I realized that regular exercise would become much, much less about losing post-baby weight or being able to eat pizza and drink beer on the weekends and more about strengthening my body, mind and soul for the daily demands of motherhood.

How does all of this tie into the season of Lent?

  

Since I'm currently pregnant with our sixth child, I can't help but feel that in many ways, being pregnant is in itself a Lent of sorts.  Forty weeks of sacrifice (similar to the 40 days of Lent), of giving up many of the foods and drinks I love (emphasis on drinks), activities I enjoy (trampoline time with the boys!), not to mention taking on daily discomforts as my body grows and adapts to accommodate the living soul within me.

During Lent, if we approach it with a bit of determination and sincerity of heart, each one of us has the capacity to go grow in love for our Lord, to be stretched in ways that may not be easy, and to adapt to perhaps a different diet, a change of schedule, to reexamine our priorities in order to make more room for prayer and acts of service, and less time for television and Facebook. All of this effort, would of course be made with the hope of nurturing the life of Christ within us - a life that, as Christians, we believe will blossom more fully on Easter.

While there's nothing wrong with giving up our list of dearest comforts, or even addictions, whether they be food or drink or technical engagements, rarely do those offerings become life-long habits. Am I ever really going to give up my daily dose of chocolate or my weekly watch of something Jane Austen?? Only should I develop a severe allergy or blindness. 

That said, to take on a particular activity rather than give up a tangible good is another way that we, as Christians, can view the mission of sacrifice during Lent.

{Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati was a great athlete and lived a life of heroic virtue.}

Some of us may choose to spend more time in prayer, ministry, volunteering or spiritual reading. I would like to write into that noble list of endeavors a sacrificial activity that I believe has the potential not only to become habit for any one, if not many of us, but to produce beautiful fruits in our lives both spiritually and physically, and that is a true devotion to Christ through exercise.

If, perhaps, fitness is already a part of your daily habit, then I hope you will find that you're already experiencing some of the benefits listed further down.  But, from my experiences of sharing day to day life with other moms, exercise easily becomes the last thing on our "to do" list (if it's there at all) when household and work loads are heavy, or emotional strain is high.

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit?

Glorify God in your body. 

1 Corinthians 6:20

As moms we may feel as though it is selfish to take time for ourselves to exercise, that exercise just doesn't have a proper place on our list of priorities, or that we simply don't have the energy to give ourselves to one. more. thing.

I understand, trust me I do!  Either we've allowed ourselves to think that exercise is selfish and self-centered, or we believe the opposite, that extreme attentions to the aesthetic of the body isn't selfish at all, but a necessary good in order to be accepted by others.

While the latter is definitely a misguided and false perception of the true end of exercise, I would argue the opposite in the case of it being selfish.  To ignore the care of our bodies is to ignore the care of ourselves as persons, as children of God, and to do so is prideful.  We are not prudently prioritizing the necessity of the body as a means through which God can accomplish his purpose and plan. When we don't take the time to take care of ourselves, we are unable to offer Him and our families the gift of our best self.

This is where the stretching and strengthening part of the Lenten sacrifice comes into play.  First, I'd like to challenge your mind to be stretched in a different direction.  You do deserve the opportunity to take care of yourself and you do have time.  We all have time for those things that are most important to us.  You are important!

"Man cannot find himself except through a sincere gift of self." 

- Blessed John Paul II

Few know more about the daily self-gift, self-donation and self-sacrifice than a mother.  By God's perfect design, our intuitive desire to serve others is deeply rooted in our feminine nature. Unfortunately, when we feel overwhelmed, worn out, or emotionally unbalanced, serving others with joy, cheerfulness, confidence, patience, and enthusiasm becomes quite a seemingly impossible calling. Loving service requires a rested body a, peaceful mind, and (if you're like me, raising a home full of boys) a stout heart.

Those virtues, patience, joy, fortitude and enthusiasm are of course gifts of grace which may be increased with prayer and, in turn, strengthened through acts of the will, but they are also greatly supported through exercise.  We are not just called to a life of self-gift each day, but to give our best selves as gifts to the Lord, to our families and to our communities.

Before the advent of Christianity, the Greek philosophers, Socrates, Plato and Aristotle, advocated physical fitness as a means of bringing body and soul into harmony with each other.  In the words of Aristotle, "To a good bodily constitution corresponds the nobility of the soul." (1)

The connection between a healthy body and a virtuous soul is woven throughout scripture, particularly in the writings of the great apostle, St. Paul, who often refers to sporting activity as a way of shedding light on the true spirit of courage that is required of us all in the Christian life.  Similar to the demands of a sport, a persons energies are directed toward the perfection of virtue and character. (2) 

Paul's encouragement in 1 Timothy 6:12, "Fight the good fight of faith" comes with strong emphasis on fight.  He didn't say try or make an effort. Zealously, he bids us to fight!  To fight means that the battle against sin and temptation is a serious one, and to engage in such a battle with a steadfast focus means that the mind, body, and will must be strong, it must be fit for the challenge!

Paul goes on to encourage us to run so that we might win the eternal prize (1 Corinthians 9:24).  The eternal prize, is of course, heaven! While sacrifice and penance may seem to be the focus of Lent, the real focus should be heaven, the eternal prize won for us by our Lord Jesus through His suffering and death on the cross.  We can unite our sacrifices to His. Yes, unite yourself to Christ every time you exercise, offering up your workouts for His greater glory each and every day with the goal of a heavenly reward!

Every athlete must keep all his appetites under control; and he does it to win a crown that fades, whereas ours in imperishable. 

1 Corinthians 9:25

Regular Exercise Has the Potential To:

1.  Bring balance our emotions.  There's no denying that we women are indeed emotional creatures. I'll be the first to admit that I don't just run for the sake of running! A primary fruit of going out for a run, whether it be a quick 3 miler or a long weekend jaunt is that I always return feeling more level headed and less sensitive to everyone and everything around me.  Exercise is scientifically proven to have a balancing effect on female hormones.  The result of more stable emotions isn't just good for our moods, but also for our spiritual perspective.  We are more apt to approach each day with greater hope and zest for the will of God in our life when our emotions are in check.

Amazing!: Just 10 minutes of vigorous exercise can double the body's level of norepinephrine, a neurohormone that is associated with alertness and feeling joyous (think of how happy dancing makes us feel!).  Research shows that stress lowers norepinephrine levels in the brain, while exercise increases those levels.

2. Ease physical pain and discomforts.  It's not just the physical demands of motherhood, the sleepless nights and endless picking up, folding and child lifting that brings on aches and pains, but also the anxiety and personal sufferings that we endure interiorly that contributes to our bodily discomfort.  It seems counter-intuitive to participate in something that is uncomfortable (exercise) in order to achieve comfort from aches and pains, but thanks to the magic of endorphins, with regular exercise we really kind find pleasant relief from physical suffering.

3.  Strengthen the mind and the will. Blessed John Paul II once said that, "Exercise can be a training ground for virtue, a school of inner balance and outer control, an introduction to more true and lasting conquests."  With those words words in mind, fitness, then, has the potential to prepare the mind to courageously face the temptations that come our way each and every day. As well, the daily choice to exercise despite a lack of feeling or energy toward activity will naturally strengthen the will, and that strength will pour out into other areas of life where we feel weakest under pressures and temptations.

4.  Provide opportunity to focus on your daily devotions. Through habitual exercise, we can become athletes of a sport and athletes of the spiritual life at the same time.  Depending on your choice of exercise, working out can offer focused time for prayer, meditation and examination of conscience particularly if you choose to run, bike, swim, hike or walk either alone or with a partner (who will pray with you). I find that the rhythm of praying the rosary fits well into the rhythm of a run or even a brisk walk. The physical-spiritual connection between prayer and sport fosters the stamina and strength that is necessary to keep our spiritual life in order as well as our practical life at home and at work.

Blessed is he who can dominate the worldly bustle which surrounds him, and savor in silence and recollection the peace of God. 

- Pope Pius XII

The primary goal of Lenten season has always been, and always will be, unity with Christ. Christ offered his body as a living sacrifice.  We, too, can offer our bodies as a living sacrifice not only in the way of bearing children and laboring in love for our families, but in enduring with fortitude the pains required to keep our bodies healthy and strong for the service of the Lord.

I hope that you feel encouraged to consider exercise as a positive part of your Lenten offerings, one that will perhaps become a life long habit, bearing fruit in your own life and in the lives of those around you as well!

(1-2. Taken from, A Catholic Perspective: Physical Exercise and Sports, by Robert Feeney.)